i'll give you something to worry about

upon driving back from a wonderful celebratory lunch date with my hubby on his birthday, i express my concern for our son.
"i'm worried about will - i hope he's doing okay." he woke up and had to eat in the middle of the night last night which is rare now, and he woke up much earlier this morning than normal.
we get on the exit ramp from I85 to get onto 285.
"i know i need to stop worrying because it's not helping anything. i'm really trying to work on it."
we're on spaghetti junction and lee speeds up and swerves a little on that ramp that curves real sharp. this kind of freaks me out.
lee says joking, "if you don't stop worrying, i'll give you something to worry about!"
i crack up and we laugh and in a weird way this makes me feel better.
we get home and will has actually taken a full nap, so therefore he has been an angel the whole time. and again, worrying has accomplished nothing.
*i had to edit this post, because i was making lee look a lot more cruel than he is. just wanted to make that clear!

flu season and church

i miss going to church. well, i guess i should say i miss experiencing worship with other believers. because i've been to church, but will is with me now instead of in the nursery because i don't want him to get too sick being so young and all. (although he still got his first cold last week, and i'm pretty sure i picked that up at church or we both did). so i'm incredibly distracted while sitting in church because i don't want will to disturb other people while they are worshipping, therefore it's hard for me to worship. i have trouble concentrating on anything anymore anyway (wow, three any words). i look forward to march when flu season has passed. for now, i will stop being an idiot and get in the word on my own - the Holy Spirit is not confined to a church building - that's fo' sho' do' and thank you, God!

contract job

I have some work for sale in a nearby furniture consignment shop. I haven't sold any paintings there yet, but one day a lady walked in and saw my red chair painting and was then interested in having me paint something for her office.
I think this is the best contract job I've ever had. I tried to learn from my mistakes in the past and I'm pleased with the result. I wasn't stressed about a deadline and I didn't get ripped off.
So, now this painting is hanging in a HR office for a transportation engineering company. She has a leopard print rug, two purple velvet covered shell tufted chairs and green nesting tables in front of it. She likes bright colors, hats, textures, etc. I just realized this painting doesn't have a name.
The trees are bright purple feathers - I repeated that element in the lamp as well.

on route to church tonight.

"do i have any boogers?" Laura says as she frantically pulls down the car visor with the tiny mirror in the middle. Lee is trying to pay attention to the road and can't help her out.

"worse!" she says, horrified. "Nose Hairs!"

so, anyway, tonight I taught my first low beginner english class. i had three students. one from mexico, one from colombia, and one from el salvador. they were all very sweet. one was particularly terrified. he's only been here four months. i taught the consonants bcdf. i can't imagine being in his shoes. body language is a very strong communicative tool. maybe i made that word up - since being out of school, and not reading as much, i have lost so much of my vocabulary.

i finished my painting! i deliver it tomorrow and should receive a nice sum of money for it. many more paintings to do.

did you know that supposedly the Bible says "do not fear" 365 times or something? wow, i'd like to look into that. even if it's half that, that's still a lot of times to say a certain thing. and even if God says it once, well, that should be enough. but i guess he knows i need repetition.

just like my english students. bbbbccccddddffff. buh buh buh buh cuh cuh cuh cuh duh duh duh duh fuh fuh fuh fuh. cab cab cab cab cab cab bed bed bed bed bed dad dad dad dad dad cob cob cob cob food food food food food

i'm pretty sure will is teething, and although last night was a very good night, i'm fearful about tonight - there it is again - fear. he bites and chews on everything especially his poor little hands.

let's see any other random thoughts to unload - my husband likes to spin in the kitchen - like a ballerina. i find this very odd, but funny - he's a big guy and our kitchen isn't huge.

if you are reading this, please pray that lee would find a job, and not only that, but a job that he loves very soon. hopefully in the atlanta area, but the carolinas are okay too.

Willy C.

six months old

my baby is six months old today!
Happy Birthday Will!

Some of my names for Will.

will wills, monkey, chunkers, Cheeks, lovebug, love dove, sweet pea, froggie, lovey, bear cub, cute boot - gosh, i think i must be forgetting several

i have a contract job for a lady's office here in town. it's a pretty big painting - 30 x 40. i'm about 80% done with it. this morning i was ready to burn it. but, now i'm excited about it again. i have these love/hate relationships with almost all of my paintings and drawings. i'll have to post a picture of it when i'm done.

time to go enjoy some ugly betty before bed. :0)

i realized last night that i never slept on my stomach in 2008.

i was so looking forward to sleeping on my stomach after i had will. but i breastfed, therefore no comfortable sleeping. this was a surprise to me.

do babies have bad dreams?

i am obsessed with sleep right now because i'm having sleep problems which is probably making my sleep problems worse.

will got the tip of one of his big toes in his mouth today. he's been working on that for a week or two now.

diaper rash ramblings

i get easily frustrated.

hormones.

i made chicken and rice soup tonight. i had all of the ingredients right in my kitchen - didn't even have to go to the store. it's funny, you think there's no food in the house and then you have six servings of homemade chicken and rice soup.

lee got a call tonight from a former coworker of mine about a possible job lead.

will has a nasty diaper rash. well, it was really nasty, but now is on the path to healing. i was looking at my journal/calendar that i keep for him and it all started after he had eaten carrots for a few days. i started him on peas - that seemed to go well. he liked them. he didn't like carrots as much. i started sweet potatoes after carrots and followed with squash and green beans. we're on our fourth day of green beans. i think he eats the carrots and green beans just because they're food and he likes to eat. he seems to adore sweet potatoes and squash. and peas are okay. but, the rash is stubborn. at first i loaded on the desitin - then it got worse so, i thought it was just dry, chapped skin from winter time and started putting lotion on him down there. then it would get better and flair up again. and then it got worse, so i've started changing him a little more often, trying A&D ointment which smells like old people and he's significantly better, but not totally normal yet. okay, i'm done talking about a diaper rash. i just feel really bad for him, although he doesn't seem to mind too bad you know that can't feel good.

i hope will and i can make it to church in the morning. i'm keeping him out of the nursery until flu season is over - speaking of, i need to look that up. going to bed now.

a blog resurrection

so, now it's a new year. 2009. my brothers encouraged me to start blogging again. so, here i am resurrecting the blog.

2008 was quite a year for me. took quite a toll on this 26 year old body. i worked until i had my baby boy in july- then i really worked for the remainder of the year - being a mom. yes, i quit my "job" to be a mother. and it has been a lesson in flexibility and consistency and trust in God Almighty. a lesson that i fear i will never really get the hang of, but the truth is, i keep forgetting it's a daily thing and that the Word of God is my sword. that's the kicker - that last part.

God took some things away from me the last half of the year. i no longer could just do whatever i wanted whenever i wanted. this was Very hard for me to get used to. and then, God took away my family's financial security when my husband was laid off in October.

remember that story about the little girl and the fake pearls and her dad wants to give her the real strand of pearls if she'll only first give up her fake ones? i've been thinking about that a lot.

it's getting late and i need to retire soon, so i'll try to wrap up quickly. words describing 2008 - fatigue, joy, amazement, sorrow, anger, extreme fatigue, anxiety, fear, Unconditional Love. in 2009 i'm gonna try to get further away from perfectionism and enjoy my family more. because while God took away, he gave. He gave me an awesome baby, a stronger relationship with my husband - and he gave me opportunities to be an Artist again. oh, and we can't forget babywise. and you know what - i'm a heck of a cook now.

whatever crap happens, God is still all about goodness.